Part 1: Complex Web of Abuse (Opinion Piece)

June 30, 2020

Part 1: Complex Web of Abuse (Opinion Piece)

As many of you know, we are passionate about paying it forward and support two organizations that provide for those facing domestic violence and homelessness (many cases a result of escaping domestic violence). 

Domestic violence affects many friends and families (whether extended family members or members of the nuclear family unit). In recent years awareness and discussions of this topic have elevated it to a broader community shedding light onto a very dark corner of our existence in the United States.

Through these relationships we have learned much more about the world of domestic violence, and its impact on people, regardless of age, gender (or gender identity), economic status, or country of origin. 

Escaping domestic violence seems simple from the perspective of the observer, but extremely complicated for those caught up in it.

The common response from many people when this topic comes up is, “just leave, get out of that abusive situation”.  It is hard to understand why abused person refuses to leave or press charges.

What we have learned from articles and documentaries, is that domestic violence is not only physical, but also psychological.

In some cases, the abuser methodically seeks out a person who appears to lack self-confidence, has low self-esteem or doesn’t appear to be an independent thinker. He or she (because it can be a woman abuser) then uses psychological manipulation to “build the person up”, placing them on a pedestal of sorts, all the while portraying himself/herself as their only advocate and seemingly protecting them from “others”.  Even family members are observed as enemies. All of this is meant to draw the person away from support systems and rely on the abuser.  The abuser then gains the trust of the victim  regardless of what the abuser does, and in turn, the abusee believes that the abuser is the only person in their life that cares and that if they do not have that person in their lives, they will not survive on their own. This gives the abuser dominance and free reign(?) to treat the person as they wish. This type of relationship feeds the abuser’s need for total dominance over another human being. There is much more to learn about this topic (future readings to come).


#children #toxicrelationships #childhood-trauma #domestic-violent-survivor #domestic-violence #emotional-abuse #homeless  #strongereveryday #heal #youareenough #youarenotalone #yougotthis #strongwomen #emotionalabuse #survivor #barrettfoundation #esperanzashelter

Domestic Violence Statistics

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